Day 50

Day 50

Rom 5:3-4 is that one that pertains to this time. Also in the KJV Rom 2:1 at the end is straight says one of my theories. I forgot that my theories can usually be backed by scripture. It’s wisdom from God who lives in me I guess. “For thou that judgest doeth the same things” or as I say, we shouldn’t tell people that they’re wrong about this or that because everything we complain about we ourselves are guilty of (or will be) in some way, shape or form. That’s why instead of resenting or getting angry at someone we would need to complete the process of clearing all the planks from our own eyes. Many scriptures back up that unless we are perfect we shall not judge or condemn another. Most of the 1^st half of Rom 2 KJV says. I’m not talking to you I’m talking to myself and everyone on earth that I know. I am upset a lot with Paul McCartney because he has to make a body sound every 30 seconds. I am really becoming aware of this just in the past week. Never stops-even as I have written this he has: hiccupped, farted, yawned, burped, cleared throat, sneezed, coughed, sniffed, sucked teeth, and popped joints. It is more like every 15 seconds and I cringe because I’m dumbfounded-it’s always going nonstop. I can’t ever nap because of it. Even when he sleeps it’s snoring. What is wrong with this poor guy. He drums on his bare skin with his hands, crumbles papers and plastic, fans through a books pages with thumb over and over-it’s all on purpose right? My blood boils-other than him it is dead silent in here a lot. I don’t barely even make a peep. When he does speak he’s critical especially responding to me. That part has gotten better though as I snap back now. It’s the only thing that stops him—pew pew-gotta cover-rot. Anyway everyday I tell myself not to write about this but I’m trapped 23 to 24 hours a day for almost 3 weeks of this nonstop. Maybe it’s a pagan demon or I like to think it’s God trying to build patience in me. I am ashamed to be part of the male species. I will be happy to never have interactions with another man when I leave Man Island here. I can’t sleep cause the holms gets louder out of jealousy I guess, I don’t know. The point was I don’t complain about things that I am guilty of but I must be semi-equal with other lame things or at least to believe I am so that I can end the judging. I hate judging. I am not petty-these are abnormally inconsiderate things I speak of. Sound is ten time louder in this little sound proof concrete box. You only had one little thing that I had complained about. I worded it wrong though I think. Not anger but attitude or negativity. I get angry in here. I don’t look at him with attitude (though for the moment I do) but pity and confusion. I get angry at the odds and absurdity but I love and continue to feel love and sympathy for this guy. I look at the positive side and that is I am learning patience which is an awesome attribute to gain. This place also makes YOU look more and more perfect. The people here are so lame that all those hundreds of things I like about you are magnified. Now even your attitude problem is no big deal. Don’t get upset I have more planks than you and I’m sorry for pointing your one plank out. I will put forth effort to avoid ever doing that. I think a better and more effective way to help you with that is prayer and example. Help me if years down the road I forget. Prayer and example is my only option k? From this moment on hold me to that k? It really is the only thing that will work. Obviously me continuing to keep you aware of it was no help and possibly only made it more prevalent and surfacey-forgive me for that. I convince myself that that was the way to help you was to continue bringing it to your awareness instead of the best way to help through prayer and example with most concentration of ridding my own planks. See I have more potential to be a better man than you will find in the world. Mucho Gusto